Steps:
1. Set the table with a clean white tablecloth and cloth napkins. Set out teacups, small juice glasses filled with fresh squeezed orange juice, real cream, sugar, warm fresh bread or scones, and butter.
2. Brew up a big pot of Irish breakfast loose-leaf tea and serve it as soon as everyone sits down at the table.
3. Serve your family a bowl of hot oatmeal while you're cooking the rest of the breakfast.
4. Fry several slices of Irish bacon (cooked soft, not crispy like American bacon) and sausages and then put them aside under a towel.
5. Next cut two tomatoes in half and fry them with black breakfast pudding and mushrooms in the fat from the bacon and sausage.
6. Fry the eggs last (or scramble them to order), arrange all the food decoratively onto plates and serve it all at once.
7. Let your family eat until they're full to bursting. If they are unable to finish, you'll know you've served a proper Irish breakfast.